Thor: Movie Review

Thor Movie Review

Thor

Rating: Pretty Damn Good

This was a tough review, a lot of mixed feedback that I had to sort through and try to understand what people really liked and really didn’t like about the movie. I gotta say giving this a Pretty Damn Good rating is seriously killing me. These reviews are less about my thoughts on the movie and more about guessing at what likeliness you’ll want to pay to see a movie in theaters. Based on that premise, my vote only makes up a portion of the overall rating and after calculating the numbers, it still ended up getting a good rating. Instead of me putting my opinion out there, let’s just focus on the stats and leave it at that.

What you’ll hate:

-It’s a little fruity, rainbow bridges and sort of goofy characters makes it hard to feel like you’re watching formidable champions and more like you’re watching some sort of Olympic figure skating show complete with the sparkly outfits. Not that anyone figure skates in this movie, but you know what I mean.
-A surprising lack of action
-The opening action scene is better than the finale so the movie doesn’t end strong
-You could have left a lot of the story out and either made the movie shorter, or added more important stuff without losing anything in the process
-The Frost Giants are also fruity and so are most of the names of things in Asgard
-The movie is long

What You’ll Love:

-It has some sort of realism to it, they use some scientific concepts and they tone down the “rainbow” aspect of the rainbow bridge, they try their best to make it as tough as possible, even though so much of it is very pansy.
-The opening action scene was actually pretty awesome
-Natalie Portman is pretty hot as a nerd, I gotta say I was liking it
-It’s a funny movie, and I think this was a very smart approach to making the movie, they knew going in just how lame the whole concept of Thor is, so instead of trying to make it serious like X Men, they let the actors play with their characters and take itself less seriously, which actually makes the overall film easier to digest
-They introduce Hawkeye, and I love who they picked to play him and I’m seriously looking forward to seeing a Hawkeye movie if they’ll go there. He was actually probably the most badass character in the movie and he’s not even in it long
-Girls are going nuts over the guy that plays Thor
-The girl who played the hooker in “Defendor” starring Woody Harrelson (I recommend it) is in the movie and she’s very funny and plays her part well
-A lot of people liked the special effects, I thought a lot of it was very cartoony and lame, but for the most part people WILL enjoy them

I didn’t hate this movie, but I didn’t love it. I just think it was okay. However, I gotta say, it’s a better approach to a true Super Hero than Superman is. Thor is very cocky and funny and simply more fun to watch whereas Superman is kind of a tool when you think about it. If you like Lord Of the Rings, GI Joe, the original HeMan movie and X-Men Origins: Wolverine, I’d say you’ll really enjoy this movie.

Trust me when I say it, regular movie theater 3D is NOT worth the extra cost at all, barely anything jumps out at the screen. Due to the fact that it’s the directing that limits just how much flies out into the camera, I doubt IMAX 3D is going to be any better. So as far as 3D is concerned don’t even bother. If you’re really not feeling all the downsides I listed for the movie, but you can’t help but be curious, check it out on regular 2D at matinee pricing. Had I paid like 6 bucks to see this movie I would be happy, but something like 14 and it was weak and nothing really popped out at you I was pretty disappointed. People who enjoyed the movie much more than I did were quick to agree that the 3D sucked. So if you take anything from this review, it’s that the extra money’s just not worth it.

Anyway, I don’t want to get too crazy on this movie, but definitely a tough review, I hope I gave a clear enough picture that you can figure out what you want to do as far as checking this movie out. I’m really interested to see what people think about this one. Please don’t hesitate to comment and we’ll get a dialogue going.

Kephra

www.kephrarubin.wordpress.com
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Copyright 2011 Kephra Rubin, movie rating system copyright 2004 Kephra Rubin, excerpts can be used if permission is asked first and a link is provided with the excerpt leading back to this post, the rating system cannot be used under any circumstances.

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About Kephra Rubin

I am slightly dyslexic and have a difficulty with writing. It's because of this that I try to write as much as I can. Lately my writing has improved quite a bit and it's thanks to everyone who reads and posts on my blog. Sometimes it is difficult for me to post as regularly as others do since everything requires a lot of rewrites. Subscribe to my blog so you always know when I've got something new up. Thanks in advance.
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16 Responses to Thor: Movie Review

  1. CMrok93 says:

    Part of what I wanted from the film was a guy in armor with a giant hammer smacking frost giants in the face…and so I got that. It was a good time at the theaters, and that’s all I asked for. Good review, check out mine when you can!

    • Kephra Rubin says:

      Yeah, and really I think that’s what most people were after because tons of people enjoyed the movie. People who didn’t like didn’t seem to hate it, it was just disappointing. Did ya see it in 3D? I didn’t think it was worth the extra money for 3D, what about you?

  2. Lauren says:

    I think Keph took the words right out of my mouth when it comes to this movie. Although I thought it was pretty good, let’s consider the point of view I’m coming from. I usually don’t think before I speak (unless you catch me on a good moment), and I’m an 18 year old Caucasian female that lists “The Chronicles of Narnia” and “The Notebook” as movie favorites. Not exactly the most objective and well rounded (when it comes to movies), but I suppose that’s an answer in itself.

    My description of this movie is that it’s evident just how “Hollywood” movies have become. It’s almost like you can see the movie directors and stunt people saying “Oh right, that’d be a good idea. Move your head a little to the left so we can see your jaw line. The girls would go crazy over that.” I almost felt as though I could see those intimate moments that the directors tried to incorporate to make the film a little better and attract more people. Almost as if they wouldn’t just let the movie stand on its own two feet and dominate in the box office simply because it’s wonderful, but they had to inject it with other references (or takes off it of) from other movies.

    And quite actually, I didn’t find Chris Hemsworth (Thor) too attractive based off of the simple fact that his brother was in “The Last Song”, a movie with Miley Cyrus. I just had to add that last sentence to prove than once again I am an 18 year old girl. Take from that what you will!

    Lauren

    • Kephra Rubin says:

      Ha ha, I think the age thing is good, we get a more rounded view of the movie. I don’t know what The Last Song is, but if it’s got Miley Cyrus in it… it’s probably porn. No, I’m kidding, lol, that girl needs to slow it down I think, lol anyway. It’s true that movies tend to be so calculated, I don’t know that that’s a bad thing provided that it’s coupled with a good story and has an overall point that is a lesson people can take home with them. In that regard, I think they did that, the lesson is that young people need to realize that they don’t know everything and need to focus all of their wild energy towards learning everything they need to know about the world so they’re prepared, instead of trying so hard to prove themselves. That’s pretty damn relevant, actually. Perhaps that’s the charm of a movie like this, almost subconsciously. Parental involvement in young people’s lives is on a steady decline and yet the need and desire for it are as strong as ever. Perhaps people really connect with that confused “What am I supposed to be? What do you want me to do?” feeling. In that sense I guess I’m okay with giving it a good rating if it has that subtle lesson in the background that sneaks its way into young people’s brains. I’d rather have people model themselves after Thor than Superman since Clark Kent is a pussy that doesn’t know how to dress himself and Thor keeps it fun and confident (although I guess thor doesn’t have an alter ego, but even Superman is kind of a dweeb, wow, I think that’s the first time I’ve ever used that word… dweeb… and I used it flawlessly too… sweet… anyway)

  3. Lauren says:

    I completely understand that thought and with that perspective, I understand why you gave it the rating you did. I think the subconscious elements of a movie are what really make it charming, or what really make it flop. Some movies are wonderful that they delve into your subconscious and affect your way of thinking (and therefore the model of your life…even if slightly…which leads up to bigger and bigger change) until you’ve become a slightly new person. Some people attribute it to experiences, but perhaps it’s because of one life altering movie that no one of thinks of attributing it to.

    I had never considered Thor in that sense, but I think it’s really spot on. I think people get so caught up in proving themselves because they think that it will give them the answers. They just keep pushing further and further into “I know what I’m doing” but secretly they don’t, and that becomes their only way of copying or rationalizing. Thor, on the other hand though, really seems to be able to keep a calm demeanor, but admit defeat and realize that he doesn’t know anything. And I think that’s where the docile nature of his personality comes in (the fuzzy bear that looks like a giant), when it becomes very obvious (with the touching moments with Natalie Portman), and with the more subtle moments that truly find themselves wrapped up in your already formed ideals about life.

    Ahh, I always love a good rant!

    • Kephra Rubin says:

      Yeah, on the outside, most movies are basically just entertainment, but the ones that people walk out of feeling pumped up about I think have that lesson that clicked in the back of their mind and it makes the movie stay with them. I’m sure it doesn’t change people, but I don’t think that’s the point of a movie. I think perhaps, even if only slightly, it exposes the audience to certain concepts or perspectives and illustrates how someone would use them. What’s the first thing kids ask in school “Why do I need to know this?” I remember telling my friends daughter that if she were throwing a party and had to hang a banner but only had a limited amount of rope and no time to get more, that she could use the Pythagorean Theorem to figure out how much rope she’d need and cut it just right before climbing up and setting the banner. It sounds odd, but it was an illustration of the concept, not just the concept, and once the concept was illustrated to her, she all of sudden started getting better math grades. Every parent tells their kid they don’t know everything, but here we see it illustrated, it perhaps opens our eyes to something very important while being fun and entertaining enough to make you want to watch it again. Which also could help send that lesson home.

      Even if people may not think about movies this in depth, I think we’re right that this sort of thing happens in the background anyway.

  4. Lauren says:

    Keph,

    First of all, I think it’s pretty awesome that you taught a young girl (while molding her mind about mathematical concepts) that you can use basic fundamental concepts that are everywhere. And it’s not the “dumbed down” version of like “Count how many jelly beans you have!” type of math-but the applicable sense of “Okay, think about mowing a lawn, or creating a fence and the dimensions that creates”. I think that’s why I was so bad at Geometry in high school. It was just a triangle. Or an octagon. There was absolutely no CREATIVITY behind it. And yes, I realize that that logic is pretty much devoid of all creativity and imagination, but why not make things fun and applicable? Does everything have to be so blunt and blase just to get the point across? It’s almost like it’s a competition between who can understand the most mundane and obscure topic…they’re considered the “brilliant” and “fantastic” ones. I don’t know, just a thought…and a rant…

    • Kephra Rubin says:

      Honestly, I think that how fun someone can make a subject shows how well they actually grasp the subject. I’ve met TONS of “smart people” people who went to Yale or harvard, or whatever i can’t remember all the college names, and it really doesn’t matter. Few of them have fun with their expertise and even fewer are passionate about their expertise. one person said to me “well I just don’t get excited, i’m a logical person, I don’t need to.” Okay, fine. Then, I met a mathemetician who WAS stoked about his studies and god damnit if he didn’t talk about numbers like they were the purest form of art in the entire universe. He grasped the SCOPE of his understanding, meaning that with every piece of information he understood, it made him realize a hundred more things he didn’t understand. He could see out into the cosmos and know that in some magical way, the small victories he was making in his field would cluster with hundreds of others, thousands, millions of others and one day lead to things like deep space travel and even predicting the weather more accurately. And we’re talking about MATH, it’s math, it’s the one subject most people can agree is the most boring! Yet math is everything, math is the way that trees grow, math is why a voice sounds sweet or bitter, math is birth and it’s life and it’s death and it’s nothingness and substance all at the same time.

      If you let it, ANYTHING can be a small and insignificant boring little nothing, if you let it, your life can be a small insignificant little nothing-worth-mentioning, but in the end, that’s all it is, you letting it be that instead of something so much more.

      Thank you so much for the encouragement in that regard, it’s rare people recognize how much thought goes into my day, lol.

  5. Jay says:

    You know, I actually took the time to watch this shitty movie so that I could write an informative alternative perspective on another fat globule squeezing out of the cinematic butter churner that is Hollywood, just to find that you guys jumped ship to a progressive philosophical conversation about our educational system and it’s adaptiveness to real world scenarios. Well fuck it, I’m writing a movie review!

    Going by Keph’s rating system I would say this movie did not completely suck my balls, though they felt moistened. The only redeeming quality to this pull a convenient solution outt-my-ass-a-thon was it’s all too brief comedic relief, though even that seemed like a direct rip off of the fish out of water humor of Terminator II. Everyone’s take on what makes a good movie, and more specifically a super-hero movie is different. Mine is How “real worldly” they make it. I mean, you’re taking a comic book or cartoon and showing people what it would look like if it was real. So when describing a Sword=hammer in the stone that creates tornadoes and rainbow bridge frost giants shooting snow from their hands powered by a glowing ice cube plus a GOD that falls into his own personalized coma from time to time as SCIENCE WE JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND YET??!! guess it just doesn’t work for me.
    Listen, I don’t mind a movie based on Norse mythology, but if you’re going to take a fictional character, derived from the son of a god that has magical powers and sacrifices himself to save others, and only in that sacrifice (I’m sure you can see where I’m going with this) can others understand what is expected of them, then I say go with Jesus. It’s about time to make that fucker a super hero, and hey, he can still have a magical hammer, he was a fucking carpenter. And really, how much cooler would christmas be if it celebrated the rise of Jesus to slay the evil Nazi zombie cannibal swamp frost giants and save the world from the demon hitler-bush overlord! Then people might celebrate it for its actually meaning again!

    • Kephra Rubin says:

      DING DONG MUTHA FUCAKS, lmao… this is pure beauty with a side of awe inspiring ass kickery. Don’t get me wrong, I thought the movie was pretty lame myself. But that’s not what it’s about, it’s the likeliness people will want to pay to see it and somehow, a how I have no understanding of, people love this dumbass movie. I’m actually trying to get my other friend to post on here about how much he hated the movie too, but he doesn’t have the balls or the flare to do it with such style, lol, hopefully he gets a little courage after reading this.

      I have to look into norse mythology… do they have a rainbow bridge? How do big giant pilaging muther fuckers have the gayest possible concept of transportation? Seriously, the pruis was invented by vikings? Amazing. So, you’ve already lost me before i’ve even given the story a chance. Then, they give us a hammer as the weapon. It’s a god damn hammer, you can’t make that gay, you can’t… until you match it up with a sword in the stoneyness… then it gets pretty gay. That and when you twirl it around by its god damn tassles and slap-fight the ground with it hoping that the little pebbles you kick up might sting your enemies…. that gets it pretty gay too.

      Demographically speaking, in terms of movies at least, we’re old bastards. Hurts to say it I know, perhaps the new era emo, twilight, world has a much bigger place in it for gayness. I don’t care about homosexuality, I’m talking about gayness, crap so pansy even chicks are like… seriously?

      I don’t know man, I might have to write the quintessential Zombie Jesus Super Hero novel… guest starring ALA as the plucky sidekick, ha ha. It’ll be the best career ender anyone ever released.

      Man, i really shouldn’t have posted that… on May 13 2011- I, Kephra Rubin, copyright this Idea unless Jason Osborne wants to do so first. Hands off the gold bitches?

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, what did you think about Captain America also being Johnny Storm?

      • Jay says:

        I totally get the rating system as the likeliness people will go see it, Actually that’s the best way to get people to read and respond, because really, who gives a shit about what one person thinks about a movie (any one person, not u Keph :)…..If I never saw a movie that even a single person didn’t like, i’d still be a movie virgin.
        As far as the dual superhero playing actor? I say fuck it! have Ed Norton play Ant Man and the Hulk at the same time, and get Toby Mcgwire to play wasp, and while we’re at it let’s get Michael Keaton, Val Kilmer, George Clooney and Christian Bale to be the Ninja Turtles……Bullshit, there are too many fucking actors out there that we have to double up like this. I’m going to be watching Captain America fighting some dude and I’ll be thinking “Why doesn’t he Just Burst into flames and torch the fucker” Oh wait…….

        • Kephra Rubin says:

          Yeah man, that’s awesome you say that because that’s the whole point of why I do the reviews this way. NOBODY cares about roger ebert, just give me enough to know what I’m going to think and I’ll decide the rest. I love movies and I get really philisophical, but it’s entertainment all the same. I don’t need a seven page article about the damn movie, because at that point I don’t need to see the damn movie anymore, lol. Not only are they reusing the same guy for cap and storm, but they’re NOT using Ed Norton for Hulk in the Avengers. I guess he’s tide up with some lame ass movie so maybe if the timing was different he’d be in it, not looking forward to the new guy though. I’m diggin’ hawkeye though, that guy has a cool presence in film I hope he takes off I like watching his work. Sucks they killed him so fast in 28 weeks later.

          • Jay says:

            I totally forgot he was even in that movie! Yeah, he died and then the wheelchair guy from OZ took over.
            Sucks about ed norton, but it’s hollywood, so fuck it. These movies are all becoming a bunch of flashing lights and big bangs for people to go sit like vegetables in the theater for 2 hours and forget that their mortgage is overdue or that they never amounted to anything after high school, and there’s nothing wrong with it, just own up to what it is…..It’s a movie about weird ass super heroes wearing stupid outfits (minus Blade and anything Kate Beckensale wears). So unless they do something original with their silly super peeps (e.g Watchmen) then stop trying to get people to view it with the same regard as “real” movies. I’m not walking out of the theater after seeing THOR and saying “wow, that film really made me think. I should re-evaluate my life, mabye I’ll blah blah arghhhhhhhagrgahrghabuoi!!!!!!!………..

            Wait, what were we talking about?

          • Kephra Rubin says:

            HAHAHAHA, Kate Beckensale, yeah… if she wasn’t such a bad actress I’d say put her in more stuff. She was so damn sexy in that Helsing movie, that movie was about as gay as Thor though, but damn she’s hot. Anyway, “Priest” fuckin’ sucked too,. I gotta write a review for it. It was worse than Thor so I’m like barely even interested in writing, lol. Sometimes ya just gotta bite the bullet though, lol

  6. John says:

    THe move was pretty gay, but waswn’t Thor always so? I was amazed at how ungay they made it.

    • Kephra Rubin says:

      That’s a good point, don’t judge it only as a movie, but a THor-Movie, and in that regard it’s pretty damn good and entertaining. I talked to a couple of friends who said they liked GI Joe, which was such a crappy movie, but they were looking at it like “Ya see a commercial with a bunch of guys in goofy looking exo suits and ya know what to expect when you see it, so you’re not disappointed” as a THOR-Movie, it’s hands down the best attempt by anyone, even animators, at bringing thor to motion from the pages of comics. I’m still not buying it on DVD, but I understand the people who liked it a little more now. Great post 🙂

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